Wednesday, July 28, 2010

I regret, therefore I am.

The Boy asked me around 11 am if I wanted to go see "Inception" with him after work.

I did.

{Free porn at Inception. Um also- Can Leo get his overdo Oscar sometime soon please?}

And my mind is blown.


One thing the movie definitely touches on is Leonardo's character dealing with great regret (about what I will not tell you) but said feeling was palpable, consuming and overwhelming for him. And y'know what? I was glad to see him riddled with regret because I think it's an honest and perfectly normal emotion to feel.

However, it seems to be quite popular these days to have your mantra be somewhere along the lines of "LIVE WITH NO REGRETS"... la dee da... makes my skin crawl! Do you really have no regrets about things you've done? You really feel comfortable and happy with every decision you've made and wouldn't change anything given the chance?

Sometimes you flipped someone off on the freeway because you were late to work and being an entirely rude citizen that day. Nothing good came from that action. You were upset, you acted rudely and inconsiderately and you SHOULD regret it. Since when can we not regret things we've done? Can we not understand the value in regret and humility and know what we did was wrong? Is everyone so above that now?

I do give people leeway who say it- I GET the reasoning behind it. And I too believe that some things you shouldn't regret in their entirety: relationships, jobs, etc. Instances where you can learn, grow and prosper are not regrettable. But not every situation is some beautiful moment playing to Kenny G. Some things you do and put up with are things you SHOULD regret because they were, in every sense of the word, sh*tty and meaningless.

And herein are a few things I would take back... given the chance. Yes- things I R-E-G-R-E-T.

I regret filling up so heartily on appetizers on a date night with The Boy in his hometown that I got sick after finishing 2 bites of the expensive, delicious dinner he just purchased me. He was not mad of course but I knew better than that as I gorged on cheese fondue and he had put a lot of thought into our dinner.

{I threw up about 15-minutes later. No discipline for appetizers}
I regret getting too drunk at my Grandpa's funeral reception. I was going through an insanely hard time and clearly needed an outlet but I'm sorry it was that night I decided to throw common sense to the wind. My Grandpa was dear to me and always made me feel like the most special girl in the world. That's not how I would have liked to spend my remembrance night for him.
I regret that my go-to childhood insult to my sister was calling her "fat" because she had a chubby stage.

I regret making fun of a girl who was being relentlessly picked on in 7th grade. I was raised better than that and usually it was my intention to seek out the outcasts and befriend them. But for some reason my insecurities were high that day and I took it out on her. I still remember her hurt face as I cowardly called her out with a crowd behind me. I regret that absolutely.

And I regret dressing only like this Sophomore year of college. HOLY HELL. REGRETS!


My point is ... you regret things. People should regret things. Please do not tell me you "LIVE WITH NO REGRETS*" (seriously, gag me) because I call a big.fat.bullsh*t on that one... regret it and learn from it, either way ob-la-di, ob-la-da, life goes on, bra.

Happy, Happy, Happy Friday friends!
Wishing you a fabulous weekend.

*Sidenote: I do not regret watching Jersey Shore tonight. :) Can't wait for this season.

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Monday, July 26, 2010

dinner, dresses & necklaces are the birthday musts

My goodness where does the blogging time go in the Summer? I swear, I have been gone every single weekend and when I finally get home at night... all I can do is sleep.

But I'm here and well-rested from another busy summer weekend: one which included a disgusting amount of fun as well as a good step in my career- nothing to complain about.

It was also my friend Elena's birthday dinner!

I met Elena in 8th grade when she had just moved to Oregon. She was shy, new, awkward and it took awhile for me to even gain an understanding of her. But once she opened up, oh how she opened up. To this day, she is literally one of the funniest people I know and her dry humor is a beautiful blend of Chelsea Handler and Bob Saget (if you haven't heard his stand-up then this makes no sense to you).

{below: Elena in background, me in foreground, at age 14 or 15}

We've been friends in all the years since and even after a few fights: some large, some small, none make-or-break, I still love what she brings to my life. I called her when I lost my virginity, I called her when I got into college, I spent hours upon hours with her at sleepovers watching movie, making prank calls, eating food... she's driven across town to pick me up when I've woken up a place I didn't intend to stay (stupid margaritas) and she basically was a huge part in lifting me up off the floor after a bad break-up. She means a lot to me and so I was happy to celebrate her. As I get older, I realize how important it is to have good friends. I witness a lot of girls who cross everyone they know (y'know the type: bitter online cruelty to others, sleep with their friend's exes to fill their own weird voids, jealous, crazed individuals), and are typically left with no one to stand by them. On the other hand, I get to enjoy these milestones with those who have surrounded me for years.

But anyway... for her dinner we went to a trendy, downtown Mexican restaurant in The Pearl and noshed on fabulous appetizers while we sipped wine and waited for our entrees. It was perfect for our age: no one got wasted and stupid but no one had to go home to a husband either (well one girl did, but we love her anyway!). We are all at the age where we're starting to feel as if we're getting a bit old... but I speak for myself and a large group of my friends when I say that we're not quite THERE yet. No one yet wants marriage, kids, a house in the suburbs... we do... but not yet.

For now- we want dinners downtown, heels we can't walk in and friends to share it with.

Happy Birthday Elena!

{The group at dinner}

{Left: Me and Yuki at the dinner. Right: Mir and Kristi}

{above: the birthday girl on the left and Miranda on the right. I love this for some reason}

{Had to go out for a bit after dinner.}

Here's what I wore:

American Apparel Dress here.

Accessories are all from Forever 21 because 3 dollars for a bracelet never gets old.

Speaking of birthdays... mine is in 2 weeks! Any suggestions on what to do? Something low key...I need help as I'm out of ideas. What have you done that's cool?

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Wednesday, July 21, 2010

I'm Psssst!

So up until last weekend, I believed that Dry Shampoo would always be a $25.00 - $45.00 purchase. Being one who damages her hair quite regularly with every treatment under the sun- I am very devoted to the "Don't wash your hair every day" rule.

Because of this- Dry Shampoo has been a lifesaver ever since I first heard of it. It meant that on my no-washing day, instead of a fancy bun I'd try to orchestrate in order to hide the day-old locks, I could let them dangle and flow all with the power of powder.

I was told early on that Oscar Blandi and Ojan were the best. I had never heard of the powder-your-scalp concept before so I trusted the word of those in the know and shelled out the 30 bucks a pop for these dry shampoos. Yes, they worked. But, without fail, every single bottle I bought would inevitably clog in the nozzle and stop spraying at some point.

The first time this happened, I took them back to Sephora where I was told to hold the nozzle under hot water.


If I had time to sit in my bathroom holding the nozzle of my stupid dry shampoo under scorching hot water, I probably have time to rewash my hair. Furthermore, they never unclogged. And it wasn't like I could just throw them in a boiling pot of H20 because the bottles float to the top. IN CONCLUSION: every single bottle of dry shampoo I've had has been useful for a certain amount of time but then always stops working and to boot- costs me about 30 bucks.

Til this last camping weekend.

I was in my tent with my two friends Carly and Megan. Megan pulled out a foreign bottle to me as Carly asked to use and they immediately started spraying it at their roots in a familiar way.

"What is that?" I asked

"Dry shampoo!" they replied.

I perplexedly looked at the bottle. I had never seen or heard of this brand before.

"How much?" I asked.

Carly instantly chimed in: "It's like 6 bucks from drugstores!!! So cheap and so good. We use it all the time."

I couldn't believe that finally Dry Shampoo had gone mainstream.

Upon return to my home on Sunday, I headed off to the local drugstore, picked up my first bottle of Pssssst! Dry Shampoo (for $6.30 thank you very much). It worked like a gem the next day and I found out that it's kinda a big deal... recommended by Allure magazine and been around for basically a century.

{Above: Lose the hat Caitlin, you're pssssst!}

F you Oscar Blandi. My greasy scalp is no longer yours to dry.

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Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Fall 2010: Boots, Silk & Horses

Here comes an original thought: I fall fashion.

I know- that is so shocking and unlike anyone else but I just had to say it. Why in July? Because I was at the gym reading my August Vogue and they included this pictorial of Raquel Zimmerman modeling fall fashion.

Holy crap- what is better than fall clothes? It makes me start to wonder what staple pieces I'm going to purchase for the dusky autumn.

I hate and love that more thought has to go into your fall/winter clothes. In the summer it's easy to grab an $8.00 tank top somewhere or $12.00 flip-flops and dance until the lights come on at the bar. Whereas in the fall, with the heavier materials and the sturdiness and quality needed to endure the weather, the purchases aren't so simple. Items like jackets, boots, sweaters are investment pieces which most likely, require a bit more money and time to find and purchase. I hate the bigger bill but I always appreciate my sound fall wardrobe pieces (especially because they carryover every year, unlike the $8.00 tank top).

Besides over-the-knee brown boots which I am planning on investing in towards the end of summer, I hadn't quite pinpointed other items I need to start scouting. But this shoot gave me a few ideas...

A cape jacket

A dramatic, silk, neck-tie blouse

A voluminous, colorful, inspired skirt

A streamlined, earth-toned, fitted outfit.

Not a jumpsuit (oh the horror imagining me squeezing into that, but perhaps this look in a dress?)

Not to mention mile-long legs, insane hair and a horse...

Enjoy your Wednesday :)

All images found here

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Monday, July 19, 2010


As I mentioned before.. I am not a delicate flower who can't handle certain activities such as Camping. I love being outside, waking up in a tent and swimming in lakes. I love smelling like campfire, cooking hot dogs and roasting Marshmallows. I do love to camp.
Henceforth (fancy), I agreed to go on a camping trip last weekend with a group of my friends. I figured spending time with my usual crew outside the confines of our regular digs would be a wonderful way to spend the weekend. And it was.
{Luckily, my Dad is an outdoorsy Dad and his camping area in his storage room is a lot like REI. I can just stop by after dinner with The Boy and pack anything I would ever need! Me packing 7/15/2010}

Camping without a bathroom and running water is a bit not my scene. As much as I loved curling up in my sleeping bag and having my hair in a ponytail all weekend.. I didn't like greeting the morning and using the restroom by crouching behind our structure and watching the pee inevitably graze down my ankle and onto my dirt-covered foot: EVERY TIME (if Freud had camping in mind when he discussed P*nis-Envy than I gotta say he was very right).
I was basically wearing dirt & pee on my feet and ankles with as much coverage as an Ugg boot.
I camp every single summer and enjoy it every time. But our camping spots always give you access to a bathroom with running water, toilet paper, mirrors and showers. That's how I like to camp and I'll combat any faux-granolay person who tells me I'm not a true camper because of that. Props to you if you love spending the entire weekend like you're at burning man but just don't judge me for enjoying some pieces of home.
Despite the less-than-stellar bathroom situation, it was actually a great weekend. Lots of friends, lots of laughs, great food, swimming, etc.: the whole shebang. We basically romped around, covered in pee, looking like sh*t... enjoying the beautiful summer weekend.
And I had mascara on the whole time.
Put that in your pipe and smoke it Hippie.
{The amazing views Oregon has to offer. There is Mount Hood as seen during our hike}
{Me, Miranda & Megan in our tent. I love these weird pictures}
{Sharing a moment}
{Miranda, Me and Megan enjoyed beautiful Lost Lake}
{Loving the pink floatie}
{Games with the birthday boy}
{The group. Love them. Skirted swimsuits are my savior due to my large derriere}
{Lounging around the campsite. See large butt stage left}
{I know.. I know- take it to MySpace, right?}
Happy Tuesday my pretty friends
PS: Great read on bringing Glamour to the Outdoors.
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Sunday, July 18, 2010

a middle eastern wedding محبوب

If you know me (or read my musings from time to time), you know that I do not love being "white". I do not hate it and really, this is not a big problem in my life. But those moments when I shut my eyes and envision a fantasy life... I always envision myself as a more darker, exotic version of myself.

I am drawn to the styles of darker women: long, dark hair; caramel skin; beautiful gem-encrusted gowns... oh, how I wish I could look like that! Funnily enough- I do have a friend who embodies this look. She was born in Jordan and she's absolutely stunning. Whenever I'm surrounded by her family- I can't help but admire the intricate outfits of her Middle Eastern family members and the palpable presence of her culture.

Her name is Noor and she was married last weekend (need a refresher?). Beyond my excitement to attend a Middle Eastern celebration, I was super excited to attend a downtown wedding and watch her and her husband enjoy their night together.

The wedding didn't disappoint! She arrived to the reception to a bumping, authentic, can't-stop-moving Muslim song and it was non-stop dancing from that point on. I don't think she stepped away from the dance floor all night.

I really couldn't believe how much fun I was having as I tried (unsuccessfully) to partake in the celebratory dances to the Middle Eastern music.

But one of the best parts was watching her new-husband (who adores her!). He is not Middle Eastern, he's a big, white, NFL football player who looks the part! But he was completely down for the cause of getting into his new role and giving his new wife a fabulous night. He was shaking and moving on the dance floor to Middle Eastern music like he had been doing it all his life. I felt like I was watching something from My Big Fat Greek Wedding. It was very sweet.

So though very different from the wedding I witnessed the day prior, this one was just as special as it exuded the same qualities: Love, Dance, Family and Friends (plus the added bonus of pretending I belonged to the Middle Eastern culture for a night).

{Carly, Yuki, Miranda and Me outside the reception hall}

{My gorgeous friend Noor (and her amazeballs dress) and her new husband}

{Husband and Wife: think their kids will be ugly?}

{Ladies at the Wedding: I'm on far right.}

{Cake and the view at the wedding}

{Dancing the night away}

{Merging of cultures}

Oh.. and just in case you want to see the music and what I'm talking about:

What did I wear? I SCORED with a Zac Posen for Target dress. Not only was it Zac Posen at Target but it was on sale to boot. Oh Target- you're such a good friend to me.

Have a good day!

أتمنى لك يوماً سعيداً

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Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Earthy Ashland: Wine, Sun & Sky

My plan was to post this on Wednesday BUT alas, I Googled too much about "Mel Gibson" and in my quest to hear more and more of his psychotic tendencies, I fell into a Trojan virus and my comp wasn't usable... until tonight. Thank God for IT nerds in my life!!! Thank you for the Virus Scanner.

Anyway! My beloved best friend computer is well again and so I'm ready to take you on a quick, quick trip to Ashland, Oregon (just like the trip I took there last Friday).

{Me en route on the 5 hour solo ride to Ashland. I take pics when I'm bored (or just on days that end in "Y")}

Ashland is the last respectable town in Oregon before the California border (just 14 miles from it). It's quite literally, one of the happiest places I've been. Why was I there? It's The Boy's hometown and his Mother was getting married. That meant a weekend of his family which may have left many Girlfriends running for the door. But with his family? No way.

They are so laid-back, so down-to-earth and ridiculously happy. Everyone that I encountered who is a resident there either makes wine on their land (for instance: his Mom lives on a vineyard) or works with a friend to make wine from the grapes on their property. On top of that… they're cultured. Small town without the stereotype. The city is about art, wine, the earth and… Shakespeare. Yes it is the home of the Oregon Shakespeare Festival which sells more tickets to more performances of more plays than any other theater in the country.

In a nutshell: it's a beautiful place full of people who are just happy living their lives. While I was there I witnessed Irish dancing, got a pedicure, saw horses, cows and goats, trolled an old book store, dipped my feet in the pool... it was just a happy, simple place and the wedding fit right along side that.

Here's a bit of my 1.5 days before I rushed back to Portland for another wedding. And yes, in case you didn't catch my drift... the town is a bit on the "Hippie" side... but isn't that nice to visit every now and again?:

Here goes it...
The night started with a casual Rehearsal Dinner at a family friend's. It was a very unique house with manicured deck and a pool but also full of unique intricacies.

{View at the Rehearsal Dinner}

{Me and The Boy at the Rehearsal Dinner in our Ashland finest. It was about 95 degrees and my hair doesn't handle that well}

{The Boy and Me enjoy the earthy swings on the porch}

{In the game room of the house}

{I always wear my earthy Maxis in Ashland: they fit, I think they're pretty and they're comfortable!}

{View from dinner}

The next morning: the Bride (The Boy's Mom) wanted to start her day with a Yoga session at her house. Not just Yoga for her but for the entire family to enjoy. So The Boy and I drove up the pastures to her home where we grunted and contorted between child's pose and warrior alongside her Stepmom, Brother, Mom, etc.

{Right before our morning Yoga- When in Rome do as the Ashlanders do...}

{The boy looking at the view from his' Mom's deck}

{Got my Yoga clothes on}

Then... it was all about the wedding:

{Time to get ready for wedding}

{The Venue: The Boy's Mom's house in Ashland}

{The Boy's Aunt, The Boy's Mom (the beautiful Bride) and The Boy, watching the Sunset at the wedding}

{Had to lose my heels at some point...}

But now it's late and I'm tired (per usual) so I will leave you a parting shot of Ashland. As the Sun set over the hills, the entire reception stopped to watch it. That's when the bagpiper from the service, picked up where he left off and played to the Sun as it headed West. It was a touching moment and the perfect nightcap to a beautiful wedding and ceremony... full of all things weddings are supposed to be: Love, Peace, Harmony... and family.

{My view}

I plan on catching up on Blogs all weekend. I miss you all dearly when I can't read your blogs and I ain't just sayin' that.

In other news, I think I fit in too well with the Hippie look.. time for a hair change! Yay!

Happy Friday!

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