Wednesday, May 30, 2012

my imperfect life

 One of the things I always grapple with is the inherent fact that having a blog invites the notion that you're a little narcissistic. Even with my ever-present self-deprecating humor and a healthy idea about what I'm good at and what I'm certainly not, I still feel a bit awkward with this idea. This is probably why I never disclose my Blog on any other social media forum. Not to hide anything (my friends all know about my blog) but just to not put it out there in the form of my life clogging up anyone's newsfeeds or Twitter homepages: "NEW POST! READ ALL ABOUT ME!". Not my style or intention (ps if you do this, I don't care at all. This is just a personal thing for myself. No shame if you rock your blog all over).

And in the spirit of proving that I don't have a blog to pretend like my life is perfect (though I sincerely hope that is evident already), I've decided to point out a few imperfections in my life:

I wax, a lot.  Be it my Italian blood or my entrance into my later 20s (or both!): I'm a bit hairy. I have a home-waxing kit and about once every 3-4 weeks,  I have a waxing party in my bathroom. I have always told my Sister that part of my "Living Will" (should it need to be executed- knock on wood) indicates that should I be unable to care for myself or make sound decisions- she better be sitting next to my hospital bed heating up my waxing carafe on schedule.
Sisters don't shake hands... Sisters gotta WAX! (surriously J, that's your job!)
I've never been to Europe. And I want to go! I really just need to get off my arse and make the arrangements. Speaking of which: not going abroad in college was the STUPIDEST decision I ever made. I don't think of it as "never regret, just smile!"- no, I fully regret that dumb choice. 
The Pacific Ocean sure is beautiful... but I'd love to be looking out over the Mediterranean.
I settled in my career path. I actually have a really good job that I like with plenty of room to grow. But the field I work in certainly wasn't something I ever dreamed of doing when I was a child. Part of me will probably always feel a bit disappointed in myself for choosing security over passion (though there's definitely value in security).
My first business trip in my grown-up job in the financial industry. Oy, bye-bye dreams of farm life!

I only got my finances truly figured out in the last two years. Before then it was spend, spend, spend, freak out, spend, not open mail, etc. Ridiculous. Thankfully, I didn't OD on credit cards or anything like that, but I had more overdraft charges on my debit card than I'd like to admit. And for material things that mean nothing. I think all high schoolers should be required to take a Personal Finance class. I certainly could have used it. 
Does this young buck look like she knew how to save a buck? Survey says- NO!

I'm psychotic about 'knocking on wood'. It's not cute and it's not cool. I do it all day long and can't help myself. For someone who sincerely questions faith in the unseen, this is quite out of character.
Finding wood to knock on during a hike... after some scary words were uttered. #GetHelp

What's an "imperfection" in your life?



Anonymous said...

these are my favorite kinds of blogposts. i dont think you really can figure someone out until you learn their flaws. and many of your supposed 'flaws' are ones i have too (like figuring out money except im still not there!). and i definitely think you need to get off your arse and get to europe. its waiting for you with open arms :)

i think my biggest imperfections are they money thing. i live in the moment and definitely not the future. my boyfriend's got his money stuff figured out and im a mess. but he accepts it and is helping me learn each and everyday without changing my passion for the things i spend on (like traveling).

i also am super impulsive. like last week i landed my dream job here (seriously DREAM job) and the immigration people wouldnt let me work it, so i booked a month long ticket beginning next week for a vacation to get out of this place. kind of regret it now, but itll be fun nevertheless. wish i had thought about it more though!

Unknown said...

Well firstly Im 22 and I still live in that tiny little room (the post you commented on), tho its much better styled these days. I'm starting to feel that Im a bit old for living on campus!
Im also hopeless with money, so broke at the moment its sad (and yet i somehow find a way to go out drinking twice a week :/ go figure!)
I get in terrible moods where i just NEED to be left alone! They can strike anytime and I will usually remove myself from any situation involving other people... i often find it very difficult to snap out of a pointless bad mood.
I havent told my parents about my blog... do yours know about your one? Im starting to recieve things to review on the blog and just told them i won it or that the company was sending testers, think its about time i told the truth :/

June said...

What a cute post Caitlin!! I could relate to your knocking on wood habit because a few years ago I was very superstitious too. At present I guess my biggest flaw is that I am terribly slow when I wake up in the mornings. And I do not have an ambition in life. Yet!!

Mandy @ In the Fashion Lane said...

Goodness... I just LOVE these kind of posts. The blog world always shows the pretty and not the struggle. I learned that when I was going through my break up. Twice. Haha.

Imperfections in me... I spend more than I should but I am fiscally responsible. I am organized in every area accept my room. Just tonight I threw more than 3 loads of clean laundry into my closet so my room looked "cleaner". I wish I valued myself more growing up...I mean what was I waiting for?

GO to Europe. I am glad I did!

Thanks for your openness and candor! XO

Hanz, Fashionista Era Design said...

Its a fab list and i agree wit you about Personal Finance course in college...I think we should suggest this to universities or try and pass a bill :p kidding..!

Europe is shd definitely try and plan your trip. Its a lifetime experience to see the history and beauty of the places I've seen livng here. :)

Keep in touch! Love your blog :)

Anonymous said...

Oh, I have so many imperfections. I know what you mean about feeling like blogging can be narcissistic, but with the right attitude it doesn't come off that way. I hope so, at least!

Whitney @ EHFAR said...

I totally not broadcast my blog on Facebook, but that's because like none of my friends know about it.

I have good credit, but still more credit card debt that I want. I don't even know what I spent it on. Probably food? I really have nothing to show for it. Live and learn, I guess.

I'm extremely lazy, when it comes to cleaning. I can cook and do laundry all day long. Organize and clean? I'll pass. I need to get better, so I don't stress the hubby out haha.

erika sorocco said...

I think I love you even more after reading this post, Caitlin! And I wish I had your bravery in RE to waxing. I just bought an at-home epilator and it took me a week to get up the nerve to even turn it on. Now I'm slowly getting into the rhythm of using it - as long as I take Tylenol ahead of time! :P

My imperfection...I can't drive. I don't know how. I don't have my license. And the thought of driving absolutely petrifies me. Sadly, it makes me dependent on anyone and everyone. I'm an incredibly independent person; but this one imperfection in my life totally renders me helpless. :(

Kate Sparkles said...

Personally au always felt semesters abroad were over rated.. I took gap year and lived/worked abroad instead.. Best experience of my life.. But what I mean o say us, bow when you have an acing overseas adventure, you won't have to worry about studying for finals, you can do something fabulous instead.

I think because i keep my blog a little anonymous I almost go the other way and post more negative stuff about my life that I can't really talk about with people I know. But there's a few of life's imperfections I haven't really mentioned on my blog before- like I won't be having bridesmaids because there's no girls in my life I feel that close too. Or that although I loved with him for 20 years and he is married to my mother, I have practically no relationship with my father and honestly wouldn't care if we never spoke again. I probably will write about that stuff oneday though but one though.. Oh and also, I'm really messy! Like I hate myself for it but can't seem to break those bad, clutter creating habits!

Pat Hatt said...

LOL everyone has flaws, I fret over things too much at times I suppose and such and clean a little bit too much maybe. I also knock on wood quite a bit and whine about my job but it is a pretty damn good one, so I shouldn't whine too much I suppose. Never been much of anywhere but that surely is a changing. As far as blog whoring goes, I don't do it much, just a tweet here and there maybe.

Lindsey @ The Hill House said...

Farm life? Really? I never would have pegged you for a farm girl, although I do have to say I love all of your hiking/camping posts. You are quite multifaceted my dear. And the job for someone to wax you?...Hilarious!
I hear ya on the finances thing. I'm really trying hard, but I just can't seem to get a handle on this whole "saving is better than spending" thing. Maybe I need to make a goal of "Move to Maui in 5 Years" or something to motivate me.
As far as my imperfections...We don't have enough time for that!! Unorganized, always running late; I think those are the two that get me the most!

Jaime @ laviejaime said...

Great post! you must change the never been to Europe... i would say mine is I still don't know 100% what I want to do with my life but taking it day by day to figure it out :) Oh and I need to get rid of my small CC debt lol

Jamie said...

Love this post!! I wrote a few weeks back about the whole narcissism're not the only one who worries about it! We all have imperfections and I think as bloggers we struggle between wanting to put the best foot forward vs coming across as perfect when we all know that's not the case. Thank you so much for sharing!!

The Blue Hour

Kisti Belle said...

LOL LOVE this post!! absolutely genius and super relatable. I'm also "a bit hairy" being greek and I def have a shaving/waxing party in my bathroom every now and then too :)

ff said...

I think PF should be taught in high schools, too. There's something to be said about lets you do what you want in your off-time, but I get what you mean about waking up and love love loving what you do everyday. Europe is awesome...I'm sure you'll get there soon!

One of my major imperfections: I suck at housecleaning. Hate it. And it can sometimes show.

Bravoe Runway said...

This is a great post Caitlin, and I love the caption...sister's don't shake hands..they gotta wax haha. My imperfections are...I can't cook, I set too high of expectations and get discouraged easily.

love jenny xoxo said...

great post!! I too am very superstitious and i worry about things, but I really try to just keep thinking positive. And I'm messy... working on that one too!


drollgirl said...

it is fab to read about flaws! we all have them!

i have settled into a job and i am not sure how to get out of it. taking big risks is not my forte, and i like to be able to pay the bills. but, it would be nice to escape this job!!!!!

finances. ay yi yi. i had 15k in debt several years ago. it was DIFFICULT to pay it all off, but i finally did. now i pay off my credit card bills every month, and try not to rack up more than i can stomach. but i sure love to shop. but, i always go for deals and have limits in place!

other flaws! i am terribly impatient. and moody. and and and. i could go on and on! i have many many MANY flaws!

happy hour 24/7 said...

so i am totally gonna stop reading your blog because you have an imperfect life! i always thought it was perfect! HAAHAHAA!!

imperfections? i think we all have that. finances was something big for me as well. i needed to make lists, create a budget. i didn't do that when i was younger. i know people might think that since i go on five million trips a year that i make so much, hell to the no. i just learned to save, plan things out, and somehow - as adult, i was more turned on to buying adult things such as electronics, furnitures, going on trips, timeless pieces (like tiffany jewelry) rather than other things. of course, i do splurge on mindless things, especially when i go to forever 21, but i have more will power to say no.

the only debt i have is my student loans, but it is like mt. hood. so it'll be a while and i wish i'd win the lottery to get that out of the way. GGAAHHH!!!

Jax said...

Is it bad that I do many of these things too??? Girl, I get my eyebrows waxes every other week. 3-4 weeks ain't nothing! That doesn't count the bleaching of hair I do in between. Love being Italian, no?? LOL!!! I also knock on wood for everythingggg!! lol

naghmeh said...

hahahahaha the knocking on wood thing and the waxing killed me!
I love that you did this post though because for some reasong those that read blogs thing bloggers have the perfect always happy life which I don't really think is true, well at least not for me!!
thanks for keepin it real ;)
oh and ps. What career path was your life dream?

| C AND C | Sarmin said...

...I can write a novel on all of my imperfections. Yeah, I don't really like to think about all that.

I totally do the knock on wood thing, I keep piece of branch in my bag all times.

Social Exposure Media said...

I'm a duck and that makes me a little imperfect in some ways, but nothing to wax about LMFAO!
You are awesome as always!!!!!!!!!

Elle Sees said...

i'm really shy and a people pleaser...ugh to both.

Kristin W said...

Perfectly normal "imperfections!" While I have been to Europe, I definitely haven't settled into my "career" (or dare I say, not even found one that's right for me yet...) and am still working on the finances.

Haha...I wish I could say I was diligent about waxing! Guess my imperfection is that I'm not ;)

Anonymous said...

This post is rather lovely, though throughout I felt like you are trying to justify something, not sure why. I don't think one's imperfections should be pointed out, as we all should gravitate towards the good in ourselves, at all times.
I followed you on GFC & BlogLovin.
Stay in touch,
P.S. Hope you follow back. :)

Amber said...

I adore this post :) None of us are perfect, and imperfections are part of life.
P.S... I am so there with the spending... finally getting it under control, but everyone once in a while... :)

Julie and Lauren said...

So cute!!

Kara said...

Oh god I could write a novel!

I'm terrible at cooking meals on a regular basis. I'm an awful movie audience most times and would rather be multitasking somehow. I let my manicures chip and don't fix them for several days. I don't floss my teeth often enough. I still occasionally have terrible skin. Ugh!

Loving your blog more and more every day - flaws or not ;)

Rick said...

sounds like the "perfect" balance to me. you have a job you love, while engaging in a creative hobby you love (fashion, blogging) and you are happy :) And it's not too late to go to Europe. My wife and I went to Italy for the first time last year (Tuscany region) and we loved it. So if you are planning a trip, I highly recommend there.

*I adore the 3rd pic in the black dress!

Unknown said...

Have you ever gotten a bruise from knocking on your hip? I officially have, this year. wah wah wah

Sara said...

This post cracked me up because I too, am a waxer! It's been hard here in Romania but I've made do-although can't wait to get back to the states where they can attack these eyebrows and get them back to normal. Thanks for your honesty, I love blog posts like this.

And if you ever do get the chance to go to Europe, I would love to help you out with information and recommendations! I've been all over, (clearly, since I live in Romania now) and would love to help.